Tips and Tools for Achieving Your Brand!
NETWORKING DECONSTRUCTED
5 Part Networking Series
PART 3 OF 5: THE CONNECTION
MODULE #3: THE CONNECTION!
Trusting that you completed your assignments from Networking Deconstructed Part 1 and Part 2, you are clear on your purpose, have practiced your elevator pitch for a variety of scenarios, have a polished outfit and attention grabbing business cards. Now you are ready to move on to mastering the in-person interaction where it is critical that you build a genuine personal connection.on.
Stage 1: Getting Your Mind Right
Now I must confess, the reason I have ventured to share my insights on networking is to help individuals such as myself who are not necessarily ‘at home’ in networking events where you know no one. Some may think me an extrovert, however, I am borderline introverted and usually do better building genuine connections in smaller, more focused groups. However, life is not going to present you with a pathway of scenarios that you are comfortable in, and success is not going to come to those who are not ready to be uncomfortable, so buckle up and let me give you the keys to a genuine engagement.
Stage 2: The Opportunity
So let’s say you attend a professional networking event where your goal is to find a job or market a service. My first tip to you would be quantity over quality! Effective networking requires you to quickly move through a crowd and ascertain which persons would be integral to your purpose and worthwhile for building mutually beneficial relationships. Now even though everyone at the event understands that each individual is there for self-interest, the key is to not come across as if you are solely interested in your personal agenda. This is important because the next tip is to offer more than you seek! When I got this nugget of advice from a networking guru, my approach to networking was forever changed. Think of the quote from Keith Ferrazzi,”the currency of networking is not greed but generosity!”
Stage 3: Making the Connection
This stage reminds me of my experience in sales. It may be uncomfortable to approach the person as you both know that you are going to ‘sell’ or ‘ask’ for something, but in this case the beauty is that you are just selling your genuine self – nothing more – nothing less! You may have a purpose, but people are choosing YOU!
Find a person across the room you want to connect with: make eye contact, smile, walk confidently towards him/her, introduce yourself, extend your hand and give a firm handshake. It is important to build a relationship by figuring out who you are speaking to. This of course is done by asking the basic questions: what’s your name? where you're from? what you do? and where do you work? Once these basics are covered, use the information gathered to build a genuine conversation about who you are and your purpose for being there. Remember your conversation should be an exchange of information not an interrogation or a soliloquy. I have this rule of thumb that you should talk less than the other person and focus on asking more questions instead of oversharing about yourself. Remember, people, even if they won’t admit it, love to talk about their experiences, accomplishments and offer advice. (If your networking happens in a coffee shop or different scenario, same applies, just the person may not know of your intention and will be trying to figure out your angle - Are you just being friendly or do you need something?)
From letting your new contact/'potential' client talk and by showing a genuine interest in their story, you can gain a sincere understanding of how your skillsets/services can be a solution in their life. But remember, your goal is offer more than you seek, so you should ask the standard question, “How could I be of service to you? or when the person shares their purpose or challenge, offer some valuable insight where you can. Ultimately, what you are doing is building goodwill!
Stage 4: Going the Extra Mile
If the context permits and you are in a service establishment where drinks are being served and speaking to someone who is a valuable connection, do not go get yourself a drink without offering the person one. More than likely the individual will kindly decline, but I do think that this simple act of thoughtfulness may go a long way in forming a perception of you as a professional savvy person. Remember, people are more inclined to help people they like, so, basically, you need to maximize the opportunities to be likable in this short window of time.
Happy connecting!